Question:
I have coached Minor Hockey for many years and this word “player confidence” always comes up.
Ryan what are your thoughts on “confidence.”
- Jon
Answer:
Jon, confidence is an interesting and elusive topic. The following is the best illustration that I have seen to illustrate how players must deal with their confidence.
Water skiing is basically comprised of two main components and a connection: the boat and the skier are connected by a rope.
The skier may move slightly off course, but essentially if the boat goes left, the skier eventually goes left, and if the boat turns to the right, the skier has no choice but to go right. This provides a tremendous analogy to the area of personal confidence.
Most of us have a tendency to put our performance on the boat and our confidence on the ski. If we choose to put outcomes or performance on the boat, we are allowing our emotions and our self worth to be influenced and controlled by external indicators of how we are doing in life. What if we play our best game ever and our opponent beats us? Does this mean that our confidence is going to be determined by our so-called performance outcome?
Under this “performance driving the boat” scenario, when our performance is really good we become really confident. Our confidence follows our performance.
The problem obviously comes when we have poor performance and poor confidence.
Athletes will often go so far as to say that they have lost their confidence.
When we allow our spirit or personal confidence to digress we lose the ability to stay personally hungry.
Here is the first gift and I wish that someone had shared this with me half-way through my NHL career: We need to change the process.
Take confidence off the ski and put it (your will and mental state) on the boat. Let it drive.
Then take performance and place it on the ski. Let it follow.
In this scenario, regardless of the environment we find ourselves in and regardless of our performance levels, we can choose to be confident.
Confidence, like courage, is influenced by environmental conditions but need not be controlled by them.
Confidence is a function of internal choice. Choice can be a wonderful ally if we don’t abdicate our responsibility to enact its power.
One of the best examples of this boat/ski concept is visualized by viewing the daily television news.
Watch our young Canadian and American soldiers in the Middle East.
If I was in this war zone, I would be hiding from snipers and car bombs and sensing very little personal confidence.
Yet watch the confident demeanour of these soldiers, as they focus on their jobs independent of the environment in which they find themselves.
They have learned the concept that they must to choose to be confident regardless of the environment.
One of the most incredible examples of choosing to have a person’s will or mental state drive the boat is encompassed in the life story of US Senator John McCain.
McCain played golf every day for seven years in his mind while in a Vietnam prison camp. He decided that for a number of hours each day he would not be a prisoner. Instead, he created a new reality; he chose to be a professional golfer.
McCain played 36 to 72 holes of golf every day. He played different courses and some nights stayed up late to finish his round.
When he returned to America people asked him what he wanted to do first.
He was 50 pounds under weight and they thought maybe he would choose a five-course meal or to sleep on an amazing bed.
Instead, he said, “I want to play golf.”
Not only did John McCain survive as a prisoner of war, but in his first round of real golf outside of his imprisonment, he shot one over par.
Choose to be confident everyday.
“Do you believe you’re a starter or a benchwarmer? Do you believe you`re an all-star or an also-ran? If the answers to these questions are the latter, your play on the field will reflect it. But when you’ve learned to shut off outside influences and believe in yourself, there’s no telling how good a player you can be. That`s because you have the mental edge.” –Rod Carew
Ryan Walter played 15 NHL Seasons and has a Masters Degree in Leadership/Business. He is a Leadership facilitator and speaks to Corporations, Organizations and Hockey Associations across North America.
For information on booking Ryan or to purchase his books or board game Trade-Deadline Hockey go to www.ryanwalter.com |
